I wish I could punch you in the face.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize