I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
