I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
we made out on top of his cat.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday