I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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