i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
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