i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
BRING THE BAGELS
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize