This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
