So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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