Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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