I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I need a beard to bite.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
