Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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