Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
