I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
