i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
