There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
