Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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