Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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