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he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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