found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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