Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
