Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he fucked my hip out of place.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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