i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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