So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
