Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
