Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
