best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
