Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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