Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
ugly people sure do ruin things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize