there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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