if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I wear drunk well.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
