This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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