i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
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We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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