i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
