So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
