She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
