Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize