im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
