There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
