Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
