Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
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dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
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I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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