Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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