seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
