Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.