I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
