I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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