Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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