her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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