terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
