So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
he fucked my hip out of place.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
