You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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