So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
